My wife told me that Chick Peas are like lettuce in a salad. Although, I didn't say it aloud, I of course thought, "this crazy broad." as one does (Who would think something like that.) Then, dinner. So Ima talkin to the wife I am "What a great salad!" "This is really nice, man, I love these ChickPeas!""we should have this all the time."

Now the night is still, and all is quiet. I am thinking about maybe having another nightcap and then the lights grow dim. A low hum comes from somewhere that can't be fathomed. It grows louder and raises the intensity within the place. As I can't stop what is coming I step back in the classic stance and hold up my arms.

HIPOCRACY! You lettace loving goof! Now you will bow down to the pea that would rule them all. quickly I check my drink, seems normal, yet someone has passed into the veganaverse. (making up his own words at this point) Improbable but still, could happen. Luckily, I've grabbed the great bottle of Vodka that was just in reach. Now what? Clearly I am in serious trouble, dangerous ground, a world with no way out. But, as luck would have it, there is an orange juice sales person just up the road, singing "liquid sunshine for sale, come and taste the sun." "I bring you the fire of the gods to freshen you drinks and make you assimilate vitimin D I will." What Luck!

Which I thought was a very strange lyric for a song and since I had all this vodka, I just made my way through the crowd and held up my half full glass too see what would happen. Glastonbury Festivale is not one to be fooled with. "Oh ya?" "You're not supposed to be here buddy, That's who!" Someone pulls me up from the scuppers and through the fog in my mind I make out, "Arr, tis a priate's life for you!" What does that even mean? Clearly that someone is going to take the last of my bottle of vodka, but I means geeze eh! Come on!

So ends day 3 on 2 week charter. Apparently I am not cap'n Jack after all. Live and learn.

Tomorow the wife tells me we're having shrimp. "It's even better than chicken nuggets." Or so they say.